Soft Sand & Wild Waves: The Year of 50

And you forget that there is pain and uncertainty and fear. And you let the moment be beautiful. Because it is.

A Woman in the World is a photographic diary exploring aging, identity, perimenopause and the stories beneath the stories.

April 18th

Sometimes you need to get ready in the morning as though the day matters. Taking a little extra time and care. Not because you’re seeing anyone special or doing anything exciting. But just to remind yourself that you are worth the time and effort.

And then, maybe, later that afternoon, you take yourself on a solo date to the beach, which miraculously, you have almost all to yourself, despite it being a warm spring Friday afternoon. And the sand is so soft and the waves are just wild enough to make you feel alive. And you forget that there is pain and uncertainty and fear. And you let the moment be beautiful. Because it is.

April 19th

Back at the beach. The water was calmer today. It seemed overcast at first glance, but it was only a thin layer of cloud. Once again there was only a handful of people and it was peaceful.

I said thank you to the water. The sky. The pebbles scattered in the sand. I spoke to Leon as I walked the waters edge, making plans for tomorrow. Our jumbled lives that I sometimes think only make sense to us. We are always coming and going.

I remember a friend once asking if we were ok in our marriage because we spent chunks of time apart. She overstepped, and I think she knew it as I bluntly assured her we were fine.

But later that day, I asked Leon. Feeling the need to check with him whether we really were ok. Wanting to know that it wasn’t just me that thought so.